Eric’s Blog

So a while back, at work over lunch, the conversation turned to dentistry for some reason, and that reminded me of something that happened to me when I was back in the Army.  After my tour in Germany, I finished things up at Ft. Polk Louisiana (where when everyone got their orders from my unit shutting down- the only one that said anything was Sgt. Dobbs, and he said ‘well son, the only thing I can say is I was there, and I got bit on the neck by a brown recluse‘). Nice.

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I swear I’m not intentionally writing chain army stories, but there are so many funny/crazy ones. I suppose this one falls in the ‘funny’ category.

I totally forgot about this one, and it came to me when I was taking all this junk that was at the house out to the curb for Santa Clara’s annual “we’ll pick up anything and any amount on the street” day. It’s a shortie, and so it’s a good one to write about before I hit the hay.

So as I stated before, my unit in Hontheim was being shut down, and we were tasked to ‘clean up’- usually that involved dumping a lot of crap in the HUGE ‘barns’ we had (P1 to P3 barn). So, I forget who told me to do it (pretty sure it was Sgt. Lamar), but RIGHT BEFORE lunch, he wanted me to dump a HMMW-V full of scrap metal and other shit in the P1 barn. Ugh- you gotta be kidding me- right before lunch?!? So not cool. I was probably napping with my crew, so I may have been a bit moody after this. I’m sure they got stuck mowing the grass.
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I think everyone can say that Fridays are the sweetest days of the week- it’s the longest period in time before we all have to go back to work. Much is the same everywhere, including my time in Germany. The problem is many did not have a European driver’s license (the battalion Command Sgt. Major gave me one for some unknown reason while I was still in ‘processing’ before I got to my unit). Anyway, to give all the troops a means to go back to Spangdahlem, a sergeant would grab the shuttle (this top heavy Mercedes Benz ‘bus’ that you see everywhere in Europe), load it up with about 40 people, and make haste to the base (where we’d load up at the Class-6 - the booze store), or the PX for audio equipment.
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Of all the memories I have of being in the Army, this is one of my favorites. Not sure why, but it’s got a bit of humor, and really epitomizes what the Army was. I remember this story because it’s soon Spring, and like most things in Spring, the lawn starts growing again. At my unit in Germany, there is grass everywhere, and like every other domesticated place, it has to be mowed. The decision of who gets to do this is easy- give it to the people that don’t have shit to do (namely my crew- the ‘Stingers’, for the missiles we were trained to fire).

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So, it’s 3:20am, and I’ve been up since 2am from all this wind we’re getting tonight, and I figured I could knock out another Army story that’s pretty apt for the situation.

In my section of 7 people, we got a staff sergeant named Sgt. Edgardo Quinones (I believe that is how his last name is spelled). Anyway, super super nice guy, shaped like a pug, and straight from Puerto Rico. One of the things that made him so fun to have around was that he was a constant source of amusement for everyone was him messing up his ch’s, sh’s, and v’s and b’s. He never said ’shit’, but ‘chit’, nor could he say ‘gloves’, but ‘glubs’. Yes, everyone snickered when he’d ask his section if we had our ‘glubs’ when we’d be out doing winter exercises.

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It’s almost a week past Christmas, and a LONG time since this story happened, but it’s one that I always remember. One Christmas I had in the Army- I think it was the last one I had there (I was saving my PTO to get home early after my tour was over in 8 months). So, the old mess hall at D 1/1 ADA was pretty barren- most anyone that had any common sense went home to be with family, but a few of us didn’t. So the skeleton crew left behind didn’t have much of a decorating spirit- we didn’t even have a tree!

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So Veteran’s day was on the 11th, and I had said I would write in my blog with a story from my Army days, and now almost 2 weeks later, and I figure I’m due. Maybe this story will hit the search engines, so other fellow Army-day comrades will see the post. It’d be great to get ahold of them.

First off, yes, I was in the Army (from ‘89 to ‘92), and some of the best memories I have ever had were from that time. Some of the stories aren’t worth telling as not knowing the people involved takes away some of what makes it special. So, after basic training, and AIT, I went to a Hawk missile battery outside of Hontheim, Germany. The unit’s designation was D 1/1 ADA (delta battery- first of the first air defense artillery). Anyway, the battery’s main job (amongst 4 or so other ones) was to provide air defense for Spangdahlem airbase. My job (well, 7 people making up a ’section’) was to provide short-range air defense for the battery which was located about 20-30km away form Spangdahlem.

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